Getting married is often a stressful time for most couples. Yet planning a wedding can be ever exciting, as you’re in love, you’re happy and you can’t wait to spend the rest of your lives together. But first, you might want to consider some of the subjects that it would help to agree upon before you walk down the aisle…1. Do you want children? Some people believe the whole point of marrying is to have a family, while others don’t even consider kids a part of the equation. Are you sure how you feel about having children? Are you happy with what your partner feels? It’s natural to be a bit nervous about having the ‘baby conversation’, but honesty is always the best policy.2. How often should we have sex? It’s amazing how quickly sex can go off the boil – particularly if you’ve had a complicated and expensive wedding that has taken months, if not years, to prepare. So do talk about how you will timetable in some good sex – even when the honeymoon is over and the daily commute takes over your life once more. If you allow yourself to believe that good sex always happens spontaneously, you might find that it quickly becomes a rather rare occurrence.3. What’s your attitude to money? These days money is the most difficult subject for couples to talk about. We can manage religion, politics and sex, but we avoid discussions about cash if at all possible. A similar attitude to expenditure is a good thing to have but if you’re not similar (maybe one of you is a spender and one a saver). Make sure that you have a pretty strong agreement about your finances before you tie the knot. Quarrels about money are often bitter and can lead to a miserable marriage.4. Do you like my parents? Most of us have parents who are ambitious for us, and this definitely applies when it comes to our choice of partner. So, do your parents really like the person you’re planning to marry? And do your partner’s parents like you? These are thorny issues that people often prefer to avoid but need to be considered. But you and your partner also need to be honest about how you both feel about each other’s families – and about how you’re going to support each other in the event that either set of parents is difficult. Many marriages flounder when arguments happen if our partners side with their families rather than with us.5. Is staying fit a long-term priority to you? It may be you both have similar attitudes to exercise – and you may even exercise together currently. Will this be a priority after you wed? What about when you have children? It’s always useful to discuss how you will keep fit when life and priorities change and you have new challenges and commitments. Don’t assume that your partner will be happy for you to go off to play football with the lads on Sunday mornings. She or he may have some notion that this will stop after you marry. It’s worth checking that you understand what’s important and non-negotiable.6. How often will we holiday – and will we always go together? By the time you marry, chances are you’ll have been on several holidays together, but people change over time. Men, often long for a bit of solitude on holiday, while women sometimes relish the idea of a spa break with girlfriends. Can you both accommodate these wishes? And are you of one mind about seeing the world, or perhaps travelling less as you get older? It’s a smart idea to list your future travel plans and see how alike your desires are compared with those of your partner.7. Will we go on ‘date nights’? Finding time together as a couple isn’t always easy – particularly when you have mortgage payments to meet and children to feed and care for. But before you marry, it’s a good idea to have a chat about how you will continue to have time together as a couple. Men and women who do this tend to keep their relationships more romantic and companionable.Photo Credit: Getty


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