Dear Aunty Aurora,
I am a Christian but I have been an idiot and had sex with my wife’s best friend. I can’t live with the guilt. Do I come clean about it and risk losing my wife? I am 38, my wife is 34 and we have been married for five years with a young son. She is a lovely, sweet girl who trusts me completely and does not deserve what I have done to her. A mutual university friend was getting married and we attended outside Lagos. We lodged all contributed a hired an exclusive country home. We had gone to a lot of trouble to organise it and the party was amazing. My wife’s bestie was there on her own, having recently split up with her long-term boyfriend. She is 32, bubbly and fun and we’ve always got on really well.
We had a brilliant evening with loads to drink and eventually went to bed around 2am. But I was buzzing and couldn’t sleep so I went down for a drink. Unfortunately, NEPA brought light and I found my wife’s friend curled up on the settee. I asked if she was OK and she reached out and put her arms around my neck. Before I knew what was happening, we were cuddled up together laughing. And then I kissed her. It was like electricity.
It felt like the most natural thing in the world to start touching one another and we ended up having sex. It was thrilling and scary at the same time because someone could have walked in at any minute. Afterwards I went back to bed around 4am. That day I hardly said a word to the others and avoided my wife’s friend. I felt the worst I have ever felt in my entire life. She texted me later Âsaying it had been a one-off and that she wouldn’t tell my wife. There will be no repeat but I am so tempted to tell my wife what happened as I am a God-fearing man and because it is so hard to live with my guilt. Thank You, Samuel, Ikoyi
Dear Samuel, You’re right to feel guilty but offloading your feelings on to your wife is not the way to go. You might be hoping she would forgive you and there is no guarantee of that. What would be a sure thing is that she would be hurt and might never trust you – or her friend – again when you and her friend probably both regret that drunken sex and intend never to do anything like this again.
Photo Credit: Getty
